Spiritual Suckers

"You Indian?" he asked me sipping his whiskey.
"Yes" I replied as I tasted my brunch (on a weekday like today)
Its my usual khana place that serves a little healthier stuff. Not very crowded at that hour.
"Which part?" he asked again.
"South, Bangalore"
I expected his next question. I play this kind of a game sometimes. Its interesting.
"So what do you do here?"
"Oh, I'm on a research" I replied showing no interest in participating in the conversation. I'd just finished my workout and an awesome round of meditation. Enjoying the first meal of the day with a calm mind is my fav thing to do.
The whiskey got to the man. He didn't seem to like my short answers.
"Well, what sort of a research is it?" he asked again.

I took a few seconds before I answered.
"Spiritual values in modern management"
"Spirituality!!" he exclaimed. I instantly recognized the blabberer in him in the form of a philosopher waiting to explode.
I wonder what makes these Indians behave as if they have the copyright on spirituality. A quick scene from the movie 'The man who sued God' flashed in my mind. I sure would wanna do it sometime myself.
"Who do you follow?” This is the first nonsensical question I get from many so called spiritual people.
“No one really”
“How is that! You said you’re on a research”
“I am”. The man felt restless. The whiskey in him granted him an instant piece of wisdom.

He rattled a Sanskrit verse from a certain Vedic scripture.

“I don’t understand Sanskrit”. I interrupted.
He felt slightly annoyed that I didn’t acknowledge his great show of wisdom of the ancient verses. “Then you should understand”.
“I’m not interested” I said with a grin.
I’m not sure exactly what caused him that restlessness. Probably the half-done feeling (happens to male-beings especially at the time of intimacy)
He didn’t give up. “You know we should be proud of our country. India is the only country that has produced so many spiritual Gurus”, he emphasized.
“Not really” I said in disagreement.
He listed a couple of anandas and maharajs.
“What should I do with them?” I interrupted again with a desi smile on my face.
He thought I’m cynical.
“They come and go. So many have come and so many will. If we are God’s children, so to say, then India is not his only girlfriend’s place on earth that he is so kind with us. There are many masters around the world such as Gurdjeiff, Socrates, St. Paul, Jesus, Md.Paigambar etc. Only your frame of reference is limited”.

He fell silent.

“How come madira (alcohol) at this time of the day” I asked him trying to change the topic.
He cheered up. “Oh, just for fun. Don’t have much to do today?”
“What do you do?”
“I’m a professor”. He continued, “I’ve taught many students in my life and from my experience I tell you that spiritual knowledge is very much needed for us”.
“For what?” I asked (I know its not very polite of me :/ )

He volunteered to rattle another verse…
I interrupted again while I liked his effort in mugging ‘em. “I don’t understand Sanskrit”.
“Well then, I don’t understand what kind of spirituality you’re researching on”.
He fell quiet and looked disappointed.
“What is the point of it all? These Gurus, philosophy and these ancient scriptures”, I inquired.
“Realization… to realize certain things in our lives” He felt energized.
“Such as” I prompted.
“To achieve peace, happiness”
“And then?” I asked while I kept staring at his Whisky bottle (Not that I don’t drink :p )

He felt clueless. Maybe the conversation didn’t go quite the way he expected. I’ve seen many such spiritually-sick, pointless philosophers. My ever abusive father is one himself.

He got up and announced while he ordered for another peg. “Hang on, I’ll join you in a while”.
He filled his glass and sat across my table.
“What inspired you to come here on a research?” He asked. I liked his friendly tone this time.
I told him briefly about my past 5 month long monkhood before I gave up my career as a corporate coach and why I want to find a middle ground having seen life from both material and non material stand points.

Exactly what is it that makes thousands of our fellow Indians get into this nonsensical spiritual blabbering. What is it that we want to prove and to who exactly. Isn’t it meant for our own realization? Doesn’t it require us to be humble, honest and be willing to learn and most importantly ‘apply’ in our lives.

Exactly what is it that makes our people rattle things like this, show off and not follow anything?!

‘nahi gnanena sadrisham
pavtramiha vidyate
tat swayam yoga samsiddhaha
kaalenaatmani vindati’

[In this world there is nothing so sublime and as purifying as the transcendental knowledge. Only the person who practices yogic sciences would attain this knowledge in due course of time.]

I offered a verse from Bhagavad-Gita as I finished my brunch and got up to leave.
Not sure if another peg of his turned nonintoxicating.